After my post on 'disappointment' the other day I had one restless and sleepless night. It's all I could think about. I pondered it, prayed, let it consume all of me, every thought and every emotion in my mind and body. And I said to myself, "self - how can I allow this one thing, this one little thing, consume all that I am this moment in time?" So I decided to pray and pray and give it to God and try to just let it go. I also thought that it was pretty stupid of me to allow this digisite to dictate whether or not I'm a good scrapbooker or up to their par...I have confidence in knowing that what I scrap are funky, colorful and creative. I do it for myself and my children, they love to see the books I create with the layouts. So I'm not going to allow these women to disempower me. My scrap style and gallery is just as good as any of those other ladies who made the team. In the meantime I've decided to just give up all together on applying for creative teams. I really dislike the competition as you've seen, I'm really not good at losing.
The past two days I've spent more time in prayer reflecting on this experience and asking God how this disappointment lesson can help me to be a better person and teach me to better serve him. Believe it, he had alot to show me and he keeps doing it...every day...thankfully I never lose at being part of God's team, we aren't chosen, anyone can be apart of it, you just have to accept Jesus as your Saviour and you're on...and that's the #1 team for me.
P.S. if you left a comment on the disappointment post (I didn't read them!!!) :-)
3 comments:
I agree with you 110% - you are a GREAT scrapper!!! It's sad for me to see that this one ct call has gotten the better of you, Julie. You are a strong lady and are blessed in SO many ways. I hope you do move on and keep scrappin' for yourself and your family. And who knows? Maybe in 6 months you'll feel better about this whole process and try again.
you should read the comments, they are very heartfelt (if i do say so myself). we all get into funks and we have to turn to the big man and our friends and family to lift our spirits, show us that there is more out there. don't give up julie, just put so much pressure on yourself! you are an amazing scrapper and memory keeper and it's your kids that will be your number one fans :)
we love ya girl...hang in there!
Well said Jules...and I love that you have found the lesson in all of this. You are so right, you are a very creative, funky, awesome scrapper...and what I see when I look at your work is the love you have for your family. That's all that "matters"...
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